Happy New Year!

2017 was filled with challenges, struggles, sadness, and heartbreak... But, it was also a year filled with memories, friendship, and family who saw me through tough times.  I am grateful for the friends and family who have held my hand, listened to me cry, and allowed me to vent.  When I needed comforting you all were there!  2017 was also filled with adventure - From Cookiecrumble Cookie Toss to Madeline's Christmas, my theatre family has been there for me through thick and thin.  It was through Mary Poppins that I lost my brother.  It was through Madeline's Christmas that my husband lost his job... Only 5 days before Christmas day.  I could of easily fell apart, but didn't have the choice to because my daughter had several more shows to go and I was working backstage or front of house for every single show.  I was thankful to have somewhere to go with families who shared their struggles and hardships in an attempt to comfort me and let me know that it will be okay. I am humbled by the love and support from our family, friends, and church family who surround me and my family with love and support.

May 2018 bring us peace, good health, even more friendship, and endless possibilities.

Here's to saying yes to new adventures!

With gratitude,

Kelley Sue

Focus Five: Prepare to Thrive and Feel Alive

I am in awe of this young lady.  Only 10 and so willing to share her thoughts, her heart and her Self with the world. Happy birthday, sweet girl!  Continue shining bright. You are amazing!

(A repost from Grounded Yoga .  All products for purchase through Grounded Kids Yoga.)

Focus Five: Prepare to Thrive and Feel Alive

Written by

Lillarose, Grounded Student, Age 10

(Grounded elevating student since age 3.)

It was a rainy day... A perfect day to do yoga to set my day straight and to breath in my emotions.  Sometimes we feel happiness, sometimes we feel sadness, sometimes we feel joy and even stress.  There is good stress and there is bad stress.  It's okay to feel these emotions.  Let's honor them all, let's talk about it and let them guide us to be the best we can be.  The Focus Five Prepare to Thrive sequence will help anyone who needs to be calm, relaxed or to become more confident.

FOCUS FIVE

I like to think that each finger has an emotion.  Think that the thumb has happiness.  Breathe in happiness and send out light.  The pointer finger has sadness.  Breathe in sadness and allow the light to embrace the darkness, shining out.  The middle finger has joy.  Breathe in joy and send out light.  The ring finger has stress.  Breathe in stress and allow the light to hug the darkness, sending out light.  And, the pinky finger has love.  Breathe into love and send out love to the world.  When you breathe and press your fingers together you are breathing in all these emotions.  Feeling happiness, sadness, joy, stress and love are all natural emotions.  Embrace them all and honor the dark, sending out love, light and comfort.  When you exhale you are allowing them out and they go into other people's breath and out into the world.

LOTUS BREATH

Imagine flowers... Like a Lotus flower, they are calming.  They grow in dirty waters, but are really pretty.  If you are in a difficult situation remember the Lotus.  You can always rise out of the muck and bring beauty to any situation.

WASHING MACHINE

In this pose, let your head and shoulders relax.  You will go in circles and in different directions just like life will take you.  Try to close your eyes in this pose.  Imagine life taking you somewhere.  Somewhere with a cool breeze and a gentle cycle.  Then, do it one more time with your eyes open and in the opposite direction.  Think about where the world is taking you.  Allow the water to rinse away all the dirt that is holding you back from living your life.

WAKE UP MOUNTAIN

Imagine yourself as a mountain... Strong and with a cool breeze.  Imagine you are that mountain.  You are feeling all the seasons (the spring, summer, winter and fall) in one swoop of wind.  Bring your arms in with an inhale and feel the wind inside you.  You will realize how beautiful it is.  When you move your arms up, exhale and allow the wind to breeze through the world for others to experience.

LEFT BREATH RIGHT BREATH

Imagine on one side you are breathing in your doubts.  On the other side, you are breathing in confidence.  With both sides there is a goodness... even the doubts.  The doubts help us push through to learn how to be more confident.  Stand tall and strong.  You are who you are.

FOCUS FIVE: PREPARE TO THRIVE

These cards are perfect to use on a rainy day, a sun shiny day or any given day.  Color, practice and breathe to prepare to thrive.

The singing bowl is just the thing to help you focus, clear your mind and set the day straight.

It's Now Or Never

When I turned 40 I went on a #fortyandfearless mission not really knowing what I'd be getting myself into.  I just knew I was tired of saying no to opportunities coming my way and knew it was time to live what I teach (with my students and my own children), which is to practice more YESES with a healthy balance of NO's.  Only God knows whats in our path and He has surprised me with adventures I never imagined.  I'm sure there are many more to come.  One surprise that landed in my lap is playing the role of Mrs. Harborlen, the one and only adult in the World Premiere play, Cookiecrumble Cookie Toss, directed by Mary Claire Branton and written by Jim Davies.

Mrs. Harborlen (Sandy Skinner, lift) and her understudy.

It all started when I helped a dear friend of mine, Sandy Skinner get the role and when her father became ill and no one else was cast to be her understudy another mother (and friend) and myself volunteered.  At first, I couldn't help myself from thinking, "Why oh why did I sign up for this?"  But, I knew better than to listen to that voice.  The ever so familiar voice of fear.  I needed to be honest with myself.  So, I told myself, "Fear is not real, Kelley Sue.  Remember?  You of all people know this."  I'd be lying to myself if I said I didn't want to do act.  I have always wanted to act.  I've modeled, been in a few commercials here and there, but have never stepped it up and actually been on stage.  Well, not since elementary school anyway.  When I was younger fear often won.  No more!

In action on set.

I told myself, "It's now or never, Kelley Sue".  It helps that I have been surrounded by unconditional support by my family.  The director, Mary Claire is fabulous and will do anything (I mean, anything) to prepare the cast for the stage.  My daughter has cheering me on from the start.  She has coached me, ran through lines with me and even took the script from me to help my inner Mrs. Harborlen come out (we all have her in us... parents).  My daughter plays, Drew Algee, scheming girl clubber who wants to stick it to the troop authority.  So, it only makes sense that I should play Mrs. Harborlen, the adult National Girl Club President, who visits to congratulate the troop on their sales only to find much, much more.  Mrs. H and Drew go head to head on stage and I have to admit, it is hilarious.  

Me and my mini me.  

After many hours and several late nights of practice (at home and at the theatre) I am finally ready.  Knowing the director believes in me (and trusts that I won't screw things up) is perfect motivation.  The other parents are cheering me on.  Most friends and family members don't even know I'm in the play.  Which is pretty darn funny because tonight, Friday, February 24 at 7:30 p.m I hit the stage with brass guts and all. 


So, all I have left to say is BRING IT ON!  Here's to #fortyandfearless #fortyandfabulous #fearaintreal #nowornever #miraclemoments and #creatingmemorieswithmybabygirl

More information about Cookiecrumble Cookie Toss - Laugh along at this bite-sized exploration of business ethics when the tiny talents take the stage at The Oak Theatre at the Samford Studio. Share with all your friends! Tickets are going fast! Tickets $15 at http://oaktheatre.com. You are in for a BIG surprise!

Girl Club and Mrs. H with the director of Cookiecrumble Cookie Toss,
Mary Claire Branton (right) and writer, Jim Davies (left)

If you haven't bought tickets yet purchase them today.  Take a hilarious ride into the throes of capitalism, when six little girls duke it out over girls' club cookie sales in the world premiere of Cookiecrumble Cookie Toss. This (profanity-free) parody of David Mamet's Pulitzer-winning play Glengarry Glen Ross uses child actors to depict the extreme absurdity of adults who've been taken over by ambition and greed. Which girl can actually move the most product? It's all about the leads! 

2017 Birthday Bucket List

Dear me,

Happy birthday!  You are blessed to have two beautiful and talented children, a husband that makes you laugh and a mother who is there for you anytime you need her.  Be sure to thank God every single day for your grandmother who is 84 and looks more beautiful today than when you were a child watching her dance across the kitchen floor.  You have stunning friends, an incredible family and cuddly pets who warm your heart and teach you to get out the door and live life.   

In 2017, blog often.  Set intentions.  Remember, that in the midst of the most difficult struggles there is almost always an opportunity for growth.  Drink more water.  Eat more kale.  Travel.  Create.  Sparkle.  Paint.  Get messy.  On the hardest of days journal, read scripture or an inspiring book, go to a yoga class or have coffee with a friend.  My hope for you in the new year is that you continue helping others in need.  Up your game.  Pray daily and often.  Surround yourself with community.  Meditate.  And sing louder.

This year, embrace wisdom and celebrate often.  My desire for you is that you become more present with your children and your husband.  The Lord is working in them and He knows what He's doing.   He has big plans!  My hope is also that your priorities become clear so you will gain a wiser perspective.  May you continue to be blessed with many more friends and live life filled with laughter and flair.  Be sure to embrace your parents and grandmother while you still can.  Remain open.  Celebrate each day like it were the last.  Cherish all the breathtaking moments (even the most difficult ones).  

With love and high expectations,
Yourself

"I sustain myself with the love of family." ~ Maya Angelou

“Surround yourself only with people who are going to take you higher.” ― Oprah Winfrey

“Life’s most persistent and urgent question is, ‘What are you doing for others?'” - Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

A sister shares childhood memories, jumps on a plan to surprise you and shares big girl dreams. 

“We spend precious hours fearing the inevitable. It would be wise to use that time adoring our families, cherishing our friends and living our lives.” ~ Maya Angelou

***

My Birthday Bucket List 

1.  Enjoy eating a delicious grass fed, free range burger on my birthday and not feel bad about it.  ✓
2.  Commit to a daily yoga practice.  Break out in pigeon pose by the end of the year!  ✓
3.  Pack lunch for the homeless and pass out with the kids (not just once, but regularly).

4.  Put flowers on my grandaddy and brothers graves.

5.  Visit my dad in Terre Haute, Indiana.  ✓
6.  Visit Rock City.
7.  Become more involved in Grounded Yoga.  ✓
8.  Take in the good and bad days with my grandmother.  ✓
9.  Have a date night with my hubby at least one night a month.
10.  Snuggle with my kids as much as possible.  ✓
11.  C-O-M-M-U-N-I-T-Y. ✓
12.  Tell my mom and my grandmother I love them as often as possible.  ✓
13.  Have a spa date with my sister.
14.  Read the children's "Storybook Bible".  ✓
15.  Study therapeutics with Martin Kirk.
16.  Take the kids to Piedmont Park for a picnic and a performance.
17.  Garden.
18.  Drink more water!
19.  Read more. And stick to one book at a time.
20.  Sit out the "technology basket" for all cell phones during family time.  (Actually keep phone in the basket.). ✓
21.  Rise with the sun and meditate.
22.  Rest at sun down. This can include sipping on tea or warm Almond Milk and/or reading a good book, taking a soothing bath, yoga, meditation, etc. ✓
23.  No technology after 10 p.m.!! (This allows for more snuggle time.) ✓
24.  Sneak up and love on my man more often. 
25.  Go away for a weekend adventure with my mom. No kids! (I rarely make time for alone time with my mom and it is so important.)
26.  Be a part of a newly planted church. ✓. (I'm super excited about this!  If you are looking for a church or just really like newly planted churches check out The People's Church here or here.)
27.  Be patient with myself.  ✓
28.  Make more time for "girlie time".  (I'm really working hard on this!  I'm going to check this off in 2017!  I promise myself.)
29.  To challenge myself after knee injury, hike a level I trail by the end of this year. ✓ 
30.  Live more colorfully! Draw and paint more!! And, yes mama, this may mean I'm getting a tattoo. ;) ✓
31.  Walk Janie Girl daily! (I missed this the most when I injured my knee.)

32.  Skype with my cousin, Jenny and her boys at least once a month. ✓
33.  Visit the "7 Places You Have to Visit That You Didn't Know Existed" (I grew up going to Callaway Gardens and Jekyll Island and so I have replaced them with two other locations.)

1. Bellwood Quarry
2. Callaway Gardens, Pine Mountain, Ga. Rocktown   ✓
3. Brasstown Bald   ✓
4. Fricks Cave
5. Talulah Falls  ✓
6. Cumberland Island
7. Jekyll Island, Ga.Providence Canyon (a.k.a. Georgia's Little Grand Canyon). ✓

34.  Get a haircut!  ✓
35.  Take a class at Country Gardens.

36.  Write a cook book with my grandmother's recipes.
37.  Organize a book of poems in memory of my grandmother.
38.  Write a "love note" to my dearest and closest friends and family the old fashioned way... snail mail.
39.  Plan a Cousin Reunion!!!

40.  Visit all of Atlanta's Best Kept Secrets: (Check out Secret Atlanta on PBS!)

1. Goat N Hammer
2. Grocery On Home
3. Monastery of the Holy Spirit (I can't wait to visit again!  I have so many wonderful memories visiting with my dad as a child.)
4. ATL Rollergirls in the Temple ✓
5. The Seed & Feed Marching Abominable
6. Tiny Doors ATL (I've come across one here and there when I'm out and about, but I think it would be fun to go on a sort of scavenger hunt and find all the doors.)

P.S.  As a birthday bonus, thank you to Maggie Parker, a student at Agnes Scott College for interviewing me for Gaia's Journal.  I enjoyed being featured in Neurofem: Women's Mental Health.

Lordy, Lordy... looks who's turning 40!

Lordy, Lordy... looks who's turning 40!  Yep, you guessed it!  Forty, fearless and fabulous!!  To celebrate, I asked several beautiful, wise and inspiring girlfriends of mine if they have any advice for turning forty.  Here's a few bits of wisdom they shared... stop wearing makeup, buy a miracle bra, don't dye your hair, throw yourself a party, embrace the sweet moments of dependence that the kids have, seize the dreams of your truth, climb a mountain, power up your activism, and have a heart to heart with your parents.  I love all of these!!!  So, I chose a few that resonate with me and I added several more of my own to live by. 

Let Your Glitter Shine.  I love old.  I love wrinkled.  I love glitter.  I'm gonna let my strands of glitter sparkle!!!

Be Authentic.  Maya Angelou said it best, "“If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be.”  By striving to be authentic I'm allowing myself to be the woman God planned for me to be.

Seize the Dreams of Your Truth. I am here on Earth to share my God given gifts and talents.  So, I'm gonna keep on shinin!

Sleep In.  During the fall and winter I basically hibernate.  And, when it rains... I sleep like a baby.  The rain grounds me.  It teaches me to be still, to stay in bed, to snuggle and to finish that book I've been meaning to finish for months.

Shine Bright, Boldly and Beautifully.  When grounded and in balance we are better able to express what we think and feel. We communicate our ideas, beliefs, and emotions from a place of love and passion. Sound therapy, singing or meditation helps unblock the throat chakra so we shine our personal truth out into the world.  

Keep On Juicing...  The earthier the better!  It's good for me, its yummy and it has many health benefits.  I also love that I have rainbow colored poo! Yeah, I said poo.  Poops important folks!  (If you are interested in learning more about the benefits of juicing give this a read, here.)

Keep On Baking...  I've been making these amazing muffins.  I call them Pulp Muffins (I'll blog later with the recipe.).  Since I juice daily I've been baking muffins with the leftover pulp.  Its great because they are perfect to snack on, to grab on the go or give as gifts!

Go Braless... Why not?

Go To the Movies.  I've created a Movie Bucket List that may end up going on forever since I keep adding to it.  Watching movies is something I rarely make time for, except for when we have family night.  I have a long list of movies I would like to catch up on.  Some I've seen before and some I haven't.  My hope is if I have a list of movies handy I'll go to the list and watch them when able.  I'll keep you posted!

Embrace the Sweet Moments.  These days it is extremely easy to overshare our personal lives.   Social media makes it super easy!  When we embrace the sweet moments (ie. our children, a special date, vacation, etc.) all to ourselves we are more in the present.  

Dream Big & Live Even Bigger.  I am celebrating every single person who has lifted me up or touched my life in some very special way.  These people have helped make me a better person.  To help get me started, I started a Gratitude Journal.  In it, I am writing something special about every person I am grateful for.  Throughout 2017 I will share what I've written and let them know my appreciation in some thoughtful, creative way.  Because life is too short to leave it bottled up inside and I want to celebrate their awesomeness out loud!

Cherish Every Moment.  Being present in the moment is so important and grounding.  Unplugging every once in a while to absorb the miracle moments is the juice of life.

Walk Through Doors.  Continue practicing YESES with a healthy balance of NO's.  Pray that new opportunities will present themselves and when they do be fearless and walk right through those doors.  

Be the Change.  I'd like to share my gifts in some big way.  I have ideas and look forward to sharing in the new year.  For now, I am super proud and grateful for the work I've been doing with Grounded Yoga and The Atlanta Yoga Movement.  Take a look, below.

• Check out my most recent blog post, "Moving On" here.
• Read Co-Founder, Cheryl Crawford's most recent post which includes my photography here.
• And, be sure to also read Grounded teacher, Kira Wilsterman's post, "The One and Only Ivan Family Yoga" here.  You'll see my photography there as well.  My kids also joined in on the class.  Look for the super cute red heads!  
• Last, check out the slideshow I created here.  (There is music, so be sure to turn down the volume.)
• Be on the look out for more!

Volunteer.  One thing I've learned is essential in keeping myself grounded is volunteering my time in some way.  Mahatma Gandhi said, “The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”  Its true!  And, when we provide our services, not expecting anything in return we learn a lot about ourselves and others.  We learn compassion, connection and love.  

Goodbye 2016... Hello 2017!

Dear 2016,

Thank you for teaching me that its okay to hurt, its okay to be weak, broken, scared and vulnerable.  Thank you for letting me know its okay to cry my eyes out, get on my knees in prayer and ask for help.  Thank you for teaching me to lean on the Lord.  Thank you for surrounding me with unconditional love and support.  Because of you, I've learned to dig deep, TRUST, soften and set aside a special time each morning for just myself and God.  Because of you, I feel comfortable raising my hands in praise and singing out loud in celebration.  I've learned the true meaning of community.  I've learned what my gifts are and the importance of using them.  I also know and understand that its both the troubles and the joys that are the Lord's gifts.

I believe good comes from sharing our personal struggles.  Not to mention if I were to only blog about rainbows and unicorns it would get real boring quick.  We are all human and we are all broken.  We all have a story.  When we are willing to share our pain and suffering, often times we are helping someone else work through their struggles.  When we allow the light to shine through the little cracks we begin to sparkle and shine.  Its a journey, but its worth it!

As I bring this post to an end, I'd like to thank all of you for allowing me to share.  God's love for my family has been incredibly awesome!  My faith has grown stronger and I am better for it.  In the New Year, my prayer for myself and my family is that peace fills in the gaps and God strengthens my faith and my marriage.  I pray for peace, good health and growth.  My hope is that God continues to use me, teach me, mold me and help me to be more present.  I wish to continue shining bright while I learn to trust in Him more day by day.  I know that God is working and He will fulfill the plans He has for my husband, my children and myself.  His image is far more astonishing than I could ever imagine!

With love and gratitude,

~ Kelley Sue

Choice

Change is hard.  When we experience good changes in life we celebrate them.  We plan dinners and parties with those closest to us.  We even celebrate on social media.  But, when it comes to heart wrenching, difficult life changes that keep us up late at night we clam up and want to close ourselves off from the world.  We refrain from posting on Facebook and if you are like me you unplug altogether.

Change is always there.  But, light is also always there also.  When we go through pain and suffering it is easy to get stuck.  Often times we become uninspired, possibly lose faith, begin eating unhealthy, surrounding ourselves with darkness from the shows we choose to watch to the books we choose to read.  Darkness is always there.  But, light shines through every nook and cranny, every crack in every wall.  Light shines at the end of every dark alley.  You get the idea.  We always have a choice.

“Whatever comes our way, whatever battle we have raging inside of us, we always have a choice. It is our choices that makes us who we are, and we always have a choice to do what's right ~ Let love and forgiveness reign.” 

- Spiderman 3

I've learned the more I resist change the more anxiety builds.  Anxiety feeds off of worry, fear and darkness begins to latch on us like a leech.  The more anxiety which is fed, the more crippled we become.  I've often related this to the symbiote in Spider Man.  Anxiety is like a symbiote.  It envelops its host and creates a bond through which the host's mind can be influenced.  But, when we meditate, pray and surround ourselves with the support of friends and family we allow ourselves to flow naturally through the changes that are taking place in our lives.  We soften and remain open.

It's hard work.  But, possible.  Here are three steps to take charge of anxiety before it takes charge of you.

1.  Meditation - Look up Mindful Meditation or add the Stop, Breathe & Think app to your phone.  The app allows you to choose your mood and a meditation will be chosen for you based off of your emotions.  Meditation allows the brain to redirect itself by creating new pathways.  You may experience the anxiety creeping in begging for your attention, but avoid it by inhaling deeply.  As you breath in imagine your breath gathering up your worries.  Release them through a slow and steady exhale.

2.  Diet - Stay away from the heat!  Spicy foods add more fire to the fire.  Avoid refined sugar and heavy foods that make you feel heavy and sluggish afterward.  Eat often and carry a snack like fresh fruit or carrot sticks with you when traveling.  Also, drink plenty of water!  A friend of mine says she drinks her water at every red light during her commute to and from work.

3.  Exercise - Go hiking!  Exercise helps fight depression.  Try going for a walk or hike for at least 10 to 15 minutes.  Nature helps clear the cob webs!  If you have a dog take them with you!  If you are up for the challenge find a moderate to advanced hike in your area.  The more exercise the better! 

A test of faith

The past several years have been filled with trials that have tested my faith, my patience and my trust in God.  If daily prayers were posted on social media my prayers for desiring to trust more would have the most "likes".  I strive to teach from where I am in the present moment.  If I'm feeling stuck on a particular day then I may teach a lesson about embracing fear or expanding the heart.  If I am concerned about someone dear to me I may teach a compassionate meditation during class.  Or if I'm overwhelmed and uninspired I may teach a lesson inspired by one of my favorite authors such as E.B. White, Roald Dahl or Dr. Suess.

Have you ever felt like your life is a movie playing before your own eyes while you are on the outside looking in?  I sure have.  I've learned to sit back and watch my life unfold.  But, this hasn't always been the case.  Throughout the past several years there have been times I have felt like I was put on auto pilot.  Just walking, breathing and going about the day out of routine.  Wake and spend time with the Lord, drive the kids to piano, teach, go to the grocery, visit my grandma and so on.  Sometimes with very little emotion while being guided throughout the day.  On the lowest days I have been my worst critic.  I can relate to Sour Kangaroo in Dr. Suess' Horton Hears A Who.  On the so-so days I have felt like Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz just trying to stay on yellow brick road in hopes to get home.  On better days I somehow manage to be cool, calm and collected (even wise) like Charlotte in E.B. White's Charlotte's Web.  Truth be told, on those days I'm just exhausted and numb.  Usually I'm going about the day in constant dialogue with the Lord.  Walking through the day in a mindful meditation while He leads me about the day and gets me where I need to be.

A few of the top most stressful life changes include a job change, commuting, moving and a death in the family.  In the past three years our family has experienced all of these.  Through these changes I have felt helpless, angry, numb, challenged and terrified.  

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” ― Lao Tzu

Life is full of change.  Some change is exciting and other changes are unexpected and sometimes frightening.  Some we celebrate and others make us want to run and hide.  But, when we allow ourselves to embrace all change something magical happens.

When we go through suffering we are given an opportunity to experience growth more deeply.  Deep within our souls.  So deep within our core that we may experience nausea or pain.  When life throws us lemons we are given an opportunity to make lemonade.  We are also given an opportunity to practice YESES. YES to friends who offer to help out with the kids!  YES to strangers who have prepared a warm meal for us!  YES to opportunities like teaching a class even though I may not feel up to it!  YES to living life even though it feels like everyone else around me is falling apart!  YES to hiking to the top of Stone Mountain!  And, YES to my children who make me laugh everyday!  

Investigate

WHAT PRESSES YOUR BUTTONS is under investigation!  Get a clue and start searching for clues.  What works for you and what doesn't?

When our buttons are pushed we react.  It's a natural response.  Most of us push buttons right back.  But, what if we chose not to?  What would happen?  What if we found a reset button?  What if we took a moment to pause?  

Breathe.  Scan.  Search for clues!

What if we actually listened to what the other person has to say without taking anything personally?  Without judgement.  What if we mindfully chose to open our hearts and understand where our friend, brother, sister, mother or the lady on the other side of the check out line was coming from?  Last week we focused on AWARENESS while we focused on our breath.  

What would happen if we welcomed CURIOSITY?  What if after our buttons have been pushed we were to STOP, zoom in on the problem and on what is happening within our bodies and searched for clues for finding our own "reset button"?  
  

The next time your buttons are pushed try these exercises:

1.  Get a Clue.  Become your very own private investigator and explore which button has been pushed.  Jot down the clues.  Do you feel misunderstood?  Left out?  Unheard?  Blamed? Most likely it is a familiar feeling that you have experienced before.  This is an opportunity for you to heal the wound.  Breathe deeply into the familiar pain, anger or discomfort.  Try not to react.  Release your breath and simply become aware of what pushes your buttons.  It is healing to journal about this.  Ask yourself what this experience is triggering inside of you?  What does this moment remind you of?  Why does this feel so familiar to you?  One of the reasons why we become upset is because the same buttons have been pushed before.

2.  Sa Ta Na Ma Meditation.  Sit in Easy Seat with your palms up on your thighs.  Close your eyes if you wish.  Take a deep and steady breath in through your nose.  Slowly exhale.  Take a mother deep breath in and rise up through the spine rolling your shoulders back and down.  Take a few seconds to find your natural breath.  Press your thumb and forefinger together with intention and say, "Sa".  Press your thumb and middle finger together and say, "Ta".  Press your ring finger and thumb together and say, "Na".  Then press your pinky finger and thumb together and say, "Ma".  Practice this in your regular voice three times.  In a whisper.  Then, silently.  Return to a whisper and then in your regular voice again.  Sit silently with your palms up and relaxed for several seconds returning to your natural breath.  Then, gently open your eyes and become aware of the shift in your energy and the sense of calmness you have achieved.  This mantra helps us to break habits because it accesses the level of the mind where habits are created.  

What Pushes Your Buttons?

What pushes your buttons?  Being criticized?  Being told on?  Being yelled at?  Feeling unaccepted?  The kids arguing?  Your sibling?  Loud noises?  Traffic?  The baby crying?  Being interrupted?  We've all had our buttons pushed.  Most likely we've even said to someone, "Don't push my buttons!"  It may even seem that our family members, spouse, friends, siblings or co-workers know exactly which buttons to push. 

When someone pushes your buttons what is your response?  Do you bite back?  Do you stomp off growling with your shoulders slumped forward and your head down?  Do you stuff your feelings away letting them boil up inside?  Do your eyes begin to fume with fire, watering because you wish someone would see it from your side?  Or do you stand strong, breathing calmly without reacting while listening openly?  Imagine if you had the tools to steer your perception to gain control of the situation.  

Bottom line, our buttons are going to get pushed and when they do it is an opportunity for growth.  I know, you didn't want to hear that.  But seriously, when we take a moment to not react and pause we experience stillness.  An opportunity for clarity appears.  When we practice this our perception shifts.

This past week I overheard my children arguing and walked into the room ready to separate them, but when I entered the room I decided to observe.  Trust me, this wasn't easy.  I don't know why this happened.  It just did.  I chose to honor the little voice inside of me that tugged at me and suggested that I remain calm and observe the situation.  I became aware of my breath and chose to not react.  I noticed that my children knew exactly which buttons to push.  They weren't listening to their brother or sister.  They were fired up and reacting while taking things personally.  They were committed to getting their point across.  Sound familiar?  I found myself wondering what would happen if one of them became silent and actually listened to what the other one had to say.  Without judgement.  Without anger.  I began to take note of how they could do such a thing.

As you may of already guessed, this did not happen and they continued to argue throughout the day.  I mindfully chose to give them space and encouraged them work it out together (and they eventually did).  But, throughout the day I continued to take notes and searched for clues on how they could shift the situation.  

I chose to share my study with my Saturday morning family yoga class.  And, everyone was able to relate.  Children, parents, grownups (without children).  I realized this is just the start to something bigger.  Something life changing! 

The next time your buttons are pushed try cultivating stillness by practicing this exercise:

1.  Remain Open.  Ask yourself if there is room for growth in this experience.  How can you grow in this moment?  Could your heart open more by rolling your shoulders back and down?  What part of your body needs to relax?  Breathe into that space and as you exhale release any tension you may be holding.  Don't overanalyze or judge yourself or the person pushing your buttons.  Just observe and remain open.